You know that feeling, the one where you're standing at the train station, or in an airport terminal, and the place is empty, and you'd like to think no one is there because you're really early, but you can't shake that awful feeling that you missed your train or plane. That's how I'm beginning to feel about the latest technology.
I'm sort of proud of my geekiness, for an old guy. I know my way around a computer pretty well; I've even popped them open to add memory and upgrade processors. We have a wireless network in our house that I set up. Of course it's an Apple setup, so it's pretty easy, but you still have to wire up a lot of stuff to go wireless. Seems like a bit of an oxymoron.
Our office looks like the bridge of the USS Enterprise at night when the room lights are off. We have small red, blue and white blinking and static lights all over the place.
We have digital cameras, cellphones, LCD flat-screen TV and a host of boxes for digital feed, and the DVD player, feeding pictures to that tube - all set up by moi.
But I'm lost, or rather at a loss to understand the need for the latest communication gear - stuff like the new iPhone, and iPod ... and I'm a big Apple fan. I just can't figure out why anyone needs a piece of equipment like that, at the price they get, let alone why it has to be on 24/7 and used everywhere people go.
What, or who, can people possibly be talking to, or need to talk to at all hours of the day?
I could understand someone like a traveling salesperson, two young lovers or maybe a reporter for a newspaper or TV station needing to be in constant contact, but that's about it.
I'm Irish, which means I'm a talker, but what can you possibly talk about all that time? Do your friends really want to hear about your every move?
I've heard some of the conversations, and they go fatuously like this as heard from one side: "Hi, Jenny. What are you doing? Oh, yeah? Oh, I just walked into Pacific Place. I think I'll have a cup of coffee, and maybe a pastry. So, are you going shopping today?" And blah, blah, blah.
I've even heard one guy sitting on the commode in a public restroom, talking on his cell. I hurriedly concluded my business and got out of there. If he was going to tell someone about his bodily functions, I didn't want to hear about it.
I particularly love the folks with the Bluetooth earpiece. Talk about being ready; they are wired for sound. If they have a lot of hair, you sometimes think they're talking to themselves. I wonder if they'll insist in their will that the damn thing be on their ear in their wooden overcoat.
I've got an OK cellphone, not one of those top-end jobs, but it has a camera, does text messaging (which I never use), accesses the Internet (which I also don't do) and other features I haven't even investigated.
I got the thing to make phone calls, necessary calls, not brainless calls. I use the prepaid plan because I couldn't possibly talk to anyone for 450 minutes each month - that's almost eight hours of non-stop talking. Why would I pay 50 bucks a month for all those minutes?
I guess there are people who are so lonely, or insecure, that they can't drive from home to the grocery store and back without the sound of a human voice in their ear.
Maybe I just don't understand. I know I'm not usually the first on my block to grab the latest gizmo that has people camping overnight outside of Circuit City.
I admit to having fun playing some Wii at a friend's house, but even then, I'm not convinced I'd use it enough at home to justify the cost.
The only gadget out there that has my divided attention is TiVo. Many of our friends have it, and swear by it, but I'm still not convinced.
There are times that we are going to the World Series of Music at the University of Washington, or a play, and we're going to miss a TV show we like, but when you look at it, unless it's Ken Burns' "The War" on PBS, what have you really missed? An episode of "Survivor" where a model, a bartender and a pig farmer are acting like complete dipsticks? Speaking of which, have any of the contestants, after that first episode, ever watched "Survivor"? How can they be surprised that everyone lies through their teeth in pursuit of a million bucks?
We may yet get TiVo, but I'm still not convinced my life is somehow vapid without it.
I just hope the train hasn't left without me.
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